Tuesday, August 7, 2007

On Demonic Sex

Sex.

Everybody asks me about sex and frankly I’m a little tired of it. “Go and look it up on the internet,” I say. Obviously I only say that in the present day. If I’ve used one of the purple tickets (which are notoriously difficult to get hold of, sometimes more trouble than they’re worth. Only the other day I was after one for the purposes of sending my good friend Bill some sonnets. He does rather rely on me to keep his publishing targets.)

Where was I?

Sex with a demon isn’t all that different from sex with a mortal. We still have the basic reproductive components that you’re used to (we’re all built from the same basic model, after all) it’s just that demons might have an extra appendage or orifice or both. The gestation times vary, naturally. We don’t have the time nor the inclination to muck about waiting for nine months to pass by. We’d much rather get it all over and done with, thank you very much. A day is about all we can be bothered with, after which we have a new demon or two to play with.

Some of the sub species of demon reproduce even faster than that. A succubus can take the seed from a man at midnight and produce a child before morning. These tend be sad, pathetic creatures; neither human nor demon, and grow up with so few social skills that they become scientists, lab assistants or doctors.

If a succubus is pulling a double shift she might, after she’s been with a man, change form to that of an incubus and lie with a woman. Seed from the man is, if you’ll pardon the pun, seeded with demalkin chromosomes and sent to fertilise the woman. These offspring are mostly human, but with enough demon inside them to further our cause upon the mortal plane. These tend toward the professions of lawyer, soldier and politician.

Higher species of demon kind produce proportionally higher valued children. The Fallen, those demons who sided with Lucifer and were expulsed from the High Place, are the progenitors of the Nephilim when they mate with a mortal. These full half-bloods share the heritage of the ancestry and become powerful indeed. They become world leaders, dictators, gifted sportsmen and, in one case, a bookseller.

That would be Harold, of course, Harold Waterman. Fathered by Lucifer upon a half-faery woman, he had the potential to unite the whole world under a single banner. Instead he chose to collect stamps, play with his train set and sell books. His temporal potential is almost unlimited and attracts all the misfits of the twilight world to his side, where they bumble along having a good time. Where’s the justice in that?

I hang about to give them a nudge in the right direction, naturally. Without me they would have been fodder for the sword of any Seraph that happened along. Do I get any thanks? Answers on a postcard please. If you want a clue the answer is no.

I was talking about what sex with a demon is like, wasn’t I?

It’s fantastic. Take it from me.

Later. X

26 comments:

yayeeha said...

Hey I dont have a profile but I too have had sex with a demon and its the shit... honest... its better than any human sex that you could ever have. Its fucking awesome.

excrement said...

i completely agree. i occasionally blog about such things also: http://excrement.wordpress.com

anywho. hit me back. we can share experiences.

d a r k c h i l d e said...

Oh Bah! Live in whatever world suits you. Loved the post.

Leatherdykeuk said...

Thank you kindly :)

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Leatherdykeuk said...

and spam also, I see :)

Esha said...

Yup. Absolutely true, the sex is min blowing, but its wearing me out. I think my demon is more astral than real and i completely don't feel like doing anything human now.....I think i'm loosing it....help!!

Leatherdykeuk said...

Demons take more than they give, I'm afraid.

Wheeze said...

Wait ...sex with a demon? Very odd ...I don't believe it but it's an interesting read.

alucard4100 said...

w8 w8 w8 i wana have sex with a demon how do i do so?? please answer

Leatherdykeuk said...

very carefully

fossie said...

Yeah very carefully. These are NOT NOT humans. They can kill you. One angel killed over 180,000 people in one night. They are playing with humans. They believe this is their world and will stop at nothing to try to take it over. They will lie cheat, steal, it is not okay. But soon it will end for them. I do think some feel bad, or sorry, but I don't think it matters to God. They made their choice. It was for this very reason, having sex and making half spirit half human children that they were thrown down to the earth. Be careful, and pray. Only God can stop them. More then likely they could care less who you are and they don't love you.

Leatherdykeuk said...

Have to agree with you, Fossie. They're not human at all. No souls. No death.

Do you still do stand-up?

fossie said...

You may think you have some underlying knowledge but God never lies, only Satan does. He is after all the father of the very first lie. Eve never became like God. Nobody can, not even Satan. He may be a god, but he is not and never will be God Almighty who made him. God's power is infinite and maybe you don't have a body, but I'm sure you can die, I actually read my Bible. I am only on here because I experienced this unexpectedly and was researching the topic. After I prayed to Jehovah I have not been bothered

Leatherdykeuk said...

Thanks for that Fossie.

I read the Bible too -- many versions of it, in fact, including the modern, spin-doctored ones. Also the lost Gospels, the Apocrypha and the Torah.

Alas that I cannot yet get my 'Gospel of Lucifer' into print.

fossie said...

Bibles do not differ in message no matter what translation or version you may have. Words that show up in many "versions" to confuse people like "Thou" and "Thy" make people want to give up on reading the Bible since it becomes so confusing to understand. But the fact remains that the Bible is the oldest and most widely acknowledged book in the world. Every Bible is in agreement with the next it doesn't matter if kings put their 2-cents into the pages (King James version) or others (greedy religious leaders) took out God's name in order to cause confusion. It is still obvious that the Bible is the inspired word of God and the guidebook for all humans.I believe the demons hate that. I also have researched the tetragrammaton & the ancient texts. I do know what I am talking about. If something wasn't included in the Bile cannon then obviously it was not supposed to be there. The Torah and Apocryphal texts are uncertain texts and therefore cannot be trusted.

Leatherdykeuk said...

*chuckles*
You believe what you wish, dear, though I had to laugh at the arrogance that the Bible was the 'oldest and most widely acknowledged book in the world'. Egads! Even if you discount the severe editing of the New Testament -- many pieces of which weren't written until the fourth to sixth century, you cannot claim the Bible is older than the stories upon which it is based. Remember that the I-Ching was written in 2400BCE and the Ugarite Texts of Ba'al predated the Hebrew Pentateuch by 800 years. Out of curiosity, do you believe the Bible says 'Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live'?

If you're claiming Lucifer was the 'father of Lies' (and remember Lucifer was a God long before the Bible was written) then let me ask you: by your argument, why gave them the concept of lies?

fossie said...

Yeah, and you probably believe that fairies sprinkled pixie dust on the earth to make the flowers too, and you laugh at me for believing in the Bible, well. There is a difference in a translation and a version of the Bible. Translations are not legally allowed to be edited or changed in anyway or else they would fall under the category of a version.A translation is a perfect replication of the original texts. As for your question of whether or not the Bible says:'Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live' well not exactly in those words but it does say at Exodus 22:18 "You must not preserve a sorceress alive." and if that means "witch" then I suppose that it says what it says. Although obviously people no longer care what the true God thinks so they squish His words out of reality and allow witchcraft to flourish and infact these days it is seen as popular. It is a very sad situation for our world today since people will be devistated when they find out the hard way just how God feels.
Lucifer made have arogantly made himself into a "god" when he tricked Eve, yes by lying the fist lie and telling her she would "become like God" when she ate of the fruit in the garden of Eden. She obviously forsook her right to worship the true God and decided she was too good for that, who knows her reasoning but she gave up perfection and imortality and that was just selfish, and stupid of her to think she would ever be smarter then her creator, just like Satan. But then I guess that is the reason we are so imperfect is becasue we take after Satan in wanting to be powerful and vain. Very few now actually can please the true God.

WiseDraco said...

Satan isn't a god. He never was ...he never will be. He is a fallen Angel. That's what he was ...is. HE'S NOT A GOD.

Lucifer told God that he wanted to be greater then him and in turn God banished him.

And "*chuckles*"? Really? OH! You're one of those severely idiotic people who think it's alright to laugh at others beliefs.

Don't be so arrogant to assume you know what you're talking about. Everything is speculation anyway. So I retract what I said ...from the reading I've done it says that Satan is a fallen angel not a god.

Leatherdykeuk said...

Ah, you're one of those who stamps their feet when someone doesn't agree, aren't you?

*pats you on the head* There There. I expect you think Jesus was white, too. Bless.

Archer~pwn said...

Fossie? ::sighs:: I know this will be pointless but I'll say it anyhow. Just because you subscribe to a religion that does have some validity in bible knowledge does not imply that's it holds the corner market on truth.

For one thing: The so-called 'canon' scripture you mention. It was the catholic church who decided which books were canon. And if I'm guessing right, you are, or were at some point, one of Jehovah's Witnesses. And according to the Jehovah's Witnesses, the Catholic Church is the bulk of Babylon the Great. How can you trust that the bible as we know it today contains anything but what the early Catholic Church wanted us to have. Council of Nicea! Witnesses talk about it day and night to prove their points. Why hasn't anyone ever thought about that part? Why wasn't anyone told, or encouraged to research that? Because the society discourages a truly objective and hard look.

Also, it may interest you that for a period of 9 years, the WTB & Tract Society applied for membership in the United Nations Department of of Public Information, non-govermental organizations in 1992 and remained members until October of 2001 after public enquiry as to 'why' If you are a witness you know the significance of the UN. I don't need to tell you.

And this only skims the surface. Trust me..there is NO ONE TRUE RELIGION. Put the society 'approved' study literature aside, which not only gives you the 'answers' but also provides the 'questions' for you in their books and magazines.

Make you own inquiry with whatever resources are available to you and trust God/Universe/Goddess/The One/Source to lead you to truth.

I'm sorry about this off-topic detour (I was merely googling to see if there was an actual word that sums up relations between demons and humans)

SelenaMoon said...

hey fossie... i'm a witch.. what are you gonna do about it?? :)

dan said...

Fossie and his or hers beliefs r funny to you as yours are to fossie. The world will unfold as it should and in the end one side will perish and the other rejoice. Not taking sides just being the medium.

Grace Mcilroy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Iblis said...

I'm clicking the metaphorical 'like' button for this article, and double clickage to your comment responses. :D

Rachel Green said...

Thank you kindly, dear Iblis *curtsies*